0:03 hi everyone my name is Wendy my nickname
0:05 is Dr Joe the nickname came from when I
0:08 got my PhD I had Dr Joe on my cake it
0:12 said way to go Dr Joe my middle name is
0:15 Joe um I’m here because I wanted to
0:19 start telling my story and uh I was just
0:24 diagnosed with autism I’m 56 years old
0:27 I’ll be 57 in a couple months I self
0:30 diagnos this past December and then I
0:32 was lucky enough to get in early cuz I
0:34 know some places have like here the
0:37 Minnesota Autism Society has a
0:39 three-year waiting list um but I was
0:42 able to get in with this Clinic that
0:44 just hired some new people and so I got
0:46 in right
0:48 away in late January and then it was
0:51 February 1st where I had the um
0:54 discussion and with the person who had
0:57 done the assessment and I met the
0:59 threshold so um I was glad for that I
1:02 know I didn’t need to have a um an
1:05 official diagnosis but for some reason
1:07 for me it just felt um I just I just
1:11 really wanted it and it’s it did seem
1:14 like um some people took it more
1:17 seriously after I said it was official
1:20 now um but so I had uh
1:24 done Bing you know I binge watched after
1:27 I heard about this from a friend I I was
1:30 like oh my gosh could this be my problem
1:33 and um so I binge watched um for a whole
1:36 week took all the tests I could and
1:39 watched videos um read articles I
1:42 ordered a bunch of books that I’ve only
1:45 partially read now but
1:47 um yeah and then I just knew
1:51 that that really was the answer to all
1:55 my issues because I’ve been suffering
1:58 for so long
2:00 in so many different ways and
2:03 um I’ve done so much therapy that um
2:09 which is a good thing um you know I’ve
2:11 gained this emotional intelligence that
2:13 I’m actually um proud of because I was
2:17 able to um raise my children completely
2:21 different than I was raised and I feel
2:23 like I I broke the trauma Bond I didn’t
2:26 pass pass it on to my kids um at least
2:30 as you know as best as my ability could
2:33 but because of all the counseling I’ve
2:34 done and self-reflection and um I did uh
2:38 these
2:39 groups with a woman who used to live
2:42 here ly Woodland I did like I don’t know
2:44 how many of her workshops three or four
2:46 and they’re like four days all day long
2:49 and
2:50 um yeah so I I just I’ve done a lot of
2:53 healing and then now since I’m in my 50s
2:57 I really don’t even have um PTSD anymore
3:01 I mean I
3:02 had the official PTSD diagnosis and of
3:06 course it was really cptsd because of my
3:09 childhood I mean it just stemmed from so
3:11 many different things um being abandoned
3:15 um then not really knowing how to take
3:17 care of myself so looking for affection
3:18 in the wrong ways and then being raped
3:21 and um being sexually harassed and
3:24 sexually bullied and grabbed and
3:28 um then and I
3:32 uh well I think all that just culminated
3:35 into me having um PTSD and so as
3:41 um as I I’ve grown older and I really
3:44 don’t have PTSD anymore I um but I still
3:49 have all this anxiety and um other
3:54 um I don’t know just fears and things
3:57 that I was just like how much therapy
3:59 does want to have have to do or how many
4:00 drugs does one have to take to get over
4:02 this anxiety um so anyway it was like a
4:07 real blessing to get this diagnosis and
4:12 to
4:13 um I mean in a way it seems like it
4:18 answers so many things for me but it
4:20 also um brings up so many other things
4:25 um good and bad and um so I I wanted to
4:31 um I wanted to share my story because
4:34 also I know like I started on this path
4:37 of learning about autism because a
4:39 friend of mine shared her story with me
4:44 and because of that that got me started
4:48 and within a couple months now I’m doing
4:50 this but I um I’m hoping that I can by
4:55 sharing my story that I can help people
4:57 out there um
5:00 whether you’re in your 30s 40s or 50s or
5:03 I I don’t know if I can help someone
5:05 younger but
5:07 um the other thing about me that I think
5:09 is related to autism is that I became an
5:12 alcoholic um I got my first drink really
5:15 young I was about 9 years old I got it
5:17 from a family member there was always a
5:19 lot of alcohol when I was growing up
5:22 but um my parents you know they always
5:25 got me to my doctor’s appointments to
5:27 school everything like that I’m the one
5:29 who really turn As Time passed I I
5:34 turned into a um rip rorn heavy drinker
5:38 partyer and I sobered up when I was 21
5:40 and had almost uh 20 years of sobriety
5:43 then I slowly started
5:46 um drinking again and then um I was able
5:52 to quit about six seven years ago and um
5:57 now I have a lot of Friday again and I
6:00 run meetings and um but I think a lot of
6:03 the
6:04 reason why I kept drinking was because I
6:07 didn’t have any hope um and I just felt
6:12 so different and unloved and um so it
6:16 just anyway but I think it’s all related
6:18 to
6:20 autism so as I’m starting to lose my
6:23 voice and cough um please hit the
6:24 Subscribe button and I’m going to come
6:28 back and um I want to share different
6:30 pieces of my story and also share um
6:33 what I’m discovering about what it’s
6:35 like to be autistic at my age um and to
6:40 realize that it you know that I’m
6:43 autistic at my age and um I do have to
6:47 say that I I overall I feel really good
6:52 and I feel hopeful for my future and I
6:56 really hope that by doing this also that
6:58 I can help
7:00 um people and if you have any questions
7:02 um please put them in the comments and
7:05 I’ll try to address them um I’ve also
7:09 done uh because of my background and my
7:13 um with sexual violence I I was you know
7:17 I had a lot of anger in me of course and
7:22 um so because of that I uh I researched
7:27 sexual violence in World War II and uh
7:30 wrote a dissertation on that that’s how
7:32 I got my PhD and um I never took a job
7:37 as a professor because
7:39 uh I was so traumatized from doing the
7:43 PHD um from researching sexual violence
7:47 and war after being a Survivor myself so
7:51 I
7:52 uh
7:54 um yeah anyway but that’s another whole
7:58 piece and a whole
7:59 um part of my life and it’s besides
8:03 breaking the trauma bond with my kids
8:05 that’s the other big thing I’m um really
8:09 proud of is the dissertation um that I
8:12 wrote um because a lot of people
8:15 weren’t they you know really didn’t talk
8:18 about sexual violence and um especially
8:21 what the Germans did um so in any case
8:26 um great thank you very much uh for
8:28 listening and if you have any
8:30 suggestions or comments or questions let
8:33 me know
8:35 thanks
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